My husband is a plant thief. He hates when I call him that. “I’m not stealing anything, I’m just taking clippings,” he says as he trims the neighbors bougainvillea bush.
It doesn’t help that our friend Jamie is the same way. They both make me stop the car so they can run into an open field and clip a branch off a plant, that to me, looks like every other branch they just grabbed. They always trek back with the enthusiasm of someone who just identified a new species of woodpecker.
One specimen in particular looks a little weird. It reminds me of “Audrey II” in Little Shop of Horrors. It keeps growing and my husband assures me that it is from a guava tree. Oddly, it showed up a day after me nagging him about his plant collection.
I’m sleeping with one eye open.