Thorny Tales From The Garden

Rob's Garden

Costa Rica Cost of Living Update: Magic Root for making bushes from clippings— $5

It’s the rainy season here in Costa Rica which in my house means I will only see my husband in the morning when he drinks a cup of coffee. After that, he is off to the garden. I would describe him as having a green thumb. Or more accurately, a swollen green and purple thumb because he constantly gets stuck with bougainvillea thorns.

“Don’t you think all these plants are overkill, Rob?” I ask.

“I’m making a double layer security fence, so I’m planting red, white, and pink bougainvillea mixed with hibiscus. But not all sloppy and mixed up.”

“Of course, Rob. That would be insane.”

He ignores me and continues talking. “There needs to be two meters of red, two meters of white, two meters of pink, and two meters of mixed red and white… in that order. That pattern will continue around the entire property.”

This is quite the attention to detail.

“It’s better and cheaper than a security wall,” he says. “But the bougainvillea will take a while. I can’t find all the colors I need. I can propagate reds, orange, purple and mixed white and purple, but I will need to buy the pure white and pinks. They just won’t take for me, and I can’t even find them in the nurseries. Until it gets going, I think I will run a clear line with sharp, barbed fishing hooks throughout the hibiscus.”

My property line is going to resemble a unicorn fart. And there is nothing more colorful than that. “You do realize that the fence is already made of barbed wire? Fish hooks seem a bit superfluous unless catch and release is part of your security plan?”

“Only catch. No release.”

Unicorn Farts

Rob thinks about what I said for a moment. “You’re right. It’s redundant, and the extra layer of the thorns should work just fine. If anyone tries to get in, we will know. I’ll just follow the trail of bloody evidence to see where it leads. That should work.”

Wow, it’s like a Jason Bourne movie right in our backyard. I look down at Rob’s hands, and most of his fingers are swollen. He’s planted hundreds of bougainvillea plants and has pricked himself with hundreds of thorns. Although the plant is mildly toxic, the thorns can lead to symptoms that mimic poison oak.

“Honey, your hands look awful,” I say.

“Exactly.”

“Exactly what?” I ask.

“It’s a security fence, sweetie. The whole idea is to make it really uncomfortable to sneak through. Now I’ve got to get back to work. I need to rappel over the ledge to plant more almond trees.”

“Is that for security too?”

“Don’t be ridiculous. It’s to attract parrots.”

So that’s the first installment of Rob’s Thorny Tales From the Garden. I’m sure there will be a second, and third edition because even with his swollen fingers the garden is the place where my husband is the happiest. And having a happy husband is all the security I need.

 

Pretty Flower

By | 2018-04-15T18:19:11-04:00 July 23rd, 2017|Categories: Garden|16 Comments

About the Author:

Nadine is the author of the best-selling series, Happier Than A Billionaire. Join her as she navigates living as an expat in the sometimes confusing, always beautiful, country of Costa Rica.

16 Comments

  1. Kai McBride January 4, 2018 at 9:35 pm - Reply

    I have tried for years to propagate Bouganvilla, unsuccessfully. Everything grows on Maui except bouganvilla and mangosteen. Whats your secret, Rob?

    • Nadine Hays Pisani January 8, 2018 at 11:50 am - Reply

      I’ve often told him that he needs to have his own blog. He spends so much time in the garden, and he loves to talk about it. All. The. Time.

      I know he propagates them from other bougainvillea plants. He uses a rooting compound after he snips them. I need to share more pictures of the garden because he has them in so many colors. And he alternated them as he planted them. He was like a mad scientist!

  2. MeLinda Lane July 24, 2017 at 3:03 pm - Reply

    Love to hear your stories… when is a new book coming out?

  3. Samuel Antley July 24, 2017 at 1:53 pm - Reply

    Rob would love my solar powered electric fence. 10,000 v and the little yellow signs on it will scare anyone away. ( In English and Spanish).

  4. Lisa July 23, 2017 at 11:41 pm - Reply

    I always enjoy reading about your adventures!

  5. Cathy Lockwood July 23, 2017 at 9:41 pm - Reply

    I love the funny banter between you two! I am actually very interested in Ron’s Costa Rica garden secrets. Thanks for sharing!

    • Nadine Hays Pisani July 27, 2017 at 9:47 am - Reply

      Yeah… I’m sure Rob thinks this banter is funny. I’m always trying to keep this guy alive.

  6. Laurie Barron, Grecia July 23, 2017 at 7:22 pm - Reply

    I’m always amused by your posts (and your book). Keep up the good work. And Rob, ever hear of garden gloves? They might save your fingers from the bougainvillea thorns.

    • Nadine Hays Pisani July 27, 2017 at 9:47 am - Reply

      LOL… I have the gloves. They are right on the kitchen table. Not sure why they are never on his hands.

  7. Bev July 23, 2017 at 5:47 pm - Reply

    You always help keep me in my fantasy of living there someday…..

  8. Marlene July 23, 2017 at 5:46 pm - Reply

    So, Rob is able to propagate Bouganvilia? Whats the secret???

    • Nadine Hays Pisani July 27, 2017 at 9:49 am - Reply

      No idea Marlene. Rob sticks all these twigs in dirt, then she does more stuff, then I get bored and walk away.

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