THE MAIDEN VOYAGE

Costa Rica Cost of Living Update: A day out kayaking and snorkeling— $0

It’s official… our bargain kayaks can float. We took our maiden voyage off Playa Conchal with our friends Ian and Sandy swimming behind. They knew exactly how to find a spectacular reef located right off shore.

I kayaked while Rob snorkeled around the coral, diving down like a seal. All at once he came up hollering, “An octopus just tried to ink me!”

We eventually headed back and stopped off at Sandy’s house. She cooked us omelets while we watched our GoPro camera footage.  It recorded my husband laughing, a sound that I can listen to over and over again. I love seeing Rob happy. His laughter levitates me and keeps me afloat, much like my second-hand kayak.

Once home, I couldn’t stop repeating how easy this excursion turned out to be. And my husband couldn’t stop pointing out how I didn’t help him load either of the kayaks into the back of our car.  Or go with him to buy them in the first place. Or hose the salty water off them that night.

He could be right about that, I don’t recall any dirty work or heavy lifting. That part is all a blur. But what isn’t a blur is the memory of that special afternoon out with my friends, where I watched my husband dive down to discover an octopus at the bottom of the ocean.

Sometimes a bargain turns out to be more valuable than you think. Where some might see a rickety, old kayak, I see years of good times and fun adventures with my friends.

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ISLAND HOPPING IN COSTA RICA

102_3855 (1024x791)Costa Rica Cost Of Living Update: 2 used kayaks— $65 each

Living at the beach has its advantages; there are a lot of fun activities, one of which is kayaking out to the small islands that speckle the horizon. Some are as close as 600 feet from shore. There you will find great places to snorkel and excellent spots for relaxing while you toss your fishing line into the ocean.

Renting a kayak ranges from $10-$20 an hour, so we’ve been keeping an eye out for an affordable used pair. And boy did we score. A dive shop was selling a fleet of nine, which of course makes my husband consider his next business venture: Rob’s Kayaking Tours. Because on vacation, who wouldn’t want a guy originally from Brooklyn touring them around an estuary saying phrases like, “You want to see a  howler monkey? Fuh-ged-about-it.” Or my favorite, “Don’t be a doo-ta-doo and paddle into a crocodile.”

Luckily, he only bought two and neither were the inflatable kind. They are made of hard plastic and from what I can see they look fine… except for that fact that they didn’t come with seats or oars.

This hasn’t discouraged Rob since he insists a good sturdy stick will push us through the mangroves while doubling as a crocodile whacking device. I can only imagine how we would sell this to potential clients:

Welcome to Rob’s Kayaking Tours: Come out on one of our fifteen-year-old seatless, oarless kayaks and push yourself through the mangroves. Enjoy the close up view of a crocodile’s mouth before beating him off with one of Rob’s hand crafted sticks! Prosciutto and fresh mozzarella sandwiches included. Fug-ged-about-it.

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HAPPY HOUR & A SURF REPORT

Costa Rica Cost Of Living Update: Pork Chops on sale— $2.50 a pound

There is something particularly exciting about doing radio interviews. Especially the variety that cover the pressing issues of a local municipality. I was once interviewed on a station outside New York City when we were preempted by breaking news that falcons were nesting on top of City Hall. Apparently, these birds were crapping all over the place.

Another time I was being interviewed by a Midwest station when I was cut short by live coverage of the Maple Seed Maven’s middle school basketball game. It was the finals and these girls rocked the house.

But I had the most fun on Radio Dos, one of the biggest radio broadcasts in Costa Rica. This was the big time; anyone who has traveled across Costa Rica is likely to have listened to hours of their programming. I even know their jingle by heart, singing it to Rob when there are lulls in our conversations (if given the option, I’m pretty sure he’d choose the lull).  I was nervous just thinking about doing this interview.

Happily, everything went off without a hitch. I sat in Witch’s Rock Surf Camp, watched the sunset, and was interviewed by the charming hosts. And instead of nesting falcons or middle school basketball games, their urgent news was the Tamarindo surf report and Happy Hour specials (high tide at 8AM, $2 Imperial Drafts).

I’m grateful for it all and so excited to see what happens next.

 

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RADIO DOS INTERVIEW

Costa Rica Cost Of Living Update: Cadbury Fruit and Nutbar (normal size)— $2

Tonight I’m being interviewed on Radio Dos between 7-9PM Eastern Time.  You can stream the show live at: http://radiodos.com/

If I’m lucky, they will let me do the infamous Tamarindo surf report.

Because we all know how well I do in the water.

(That’s not a stalker but my husband to the left… the only guy in Costa Rica who swims with his sunglasses on.)

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SAND SWIMMING

Costa Rica Costa Of Living Update: Used 18 foot pongo, including a 40 HP Yamaha two-stroke outboard motor with trailer— $6500

“You have to jump and swim to shore,” my friend Ian said. This is not what you want to hear when out on a leisurely fishing trip. Oddly, this is happening more and more frequently. While living in Costa Rica, the phrase “you have to jump overboard” seems to be as common as, “Hey, let’s investigate that bat cave.” I’m never wearing the appropriate footwear on either occasion.

We were bringing Ian’s  boat back to the coast, where we unwisely unloaded it off the trailer just a few hours before. (This was not off a paved decline like I’m used to in New Jersey, but rouge style straight off a sandy beach.) It was only until the swells picked up that we realized bringing it back in would be problematic. The sea was ugly that day my friends.

In an attempt to not let the only waif like individual—one who would surely add nothing to this endeavor except un-witty banter— get pinned between a runaway boat and trailer positioned on the beach, I was instructed to jump overboard and swim to shore. Or perhaps they just wanted to get rid of the dead weight. I’ll never know. Either way, I couldn’t see any upside in remaining alongside my husband, so I jumped off the boat—port side to be exact— with the dexterity of Steve Martin.

With so much adrenaline coursing through my veins, I swam unlike ever before. I often use my long perfected doggie paddle maneuver whenever dumped into the sea, but somehow I convinced myself to outstretch my arms as a normal person would who didn’t want to end up at the bottom of the ocean.

I must have no concept of my surroundings since after a few minutes, I found myself  swimming on land. I actually beached myself. As my belly sunk further into the sand, I was still outstretching my arms in a pumping motion that could easily be described as a cross between a side stroke and someone having an unfortunate grand mal seizure.  This actually drew a crowd and I was glad I could entertain the tourists around me. If I recall correctly, I might have turned over and did the backstroke. I’m sure I heard applause.

It appears I invented a new sport… sand swimming. I can attest that it is a great cardiovascular activity, and can be performed for a good seven minutes before a small child runs up and says, “You need help lady?”

As for the boat, that’s a whole different story. Maybe I’ll leave that one for the next book. In the meantime, I’ll just keep smiling.

 

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THE BIRD WHISPERER

Costa Rica Cost Of Living Update: 9 Volt Energizer Max battery $4.30

My husband has impeccable hearing… at least for the things that matter. He heard a thump, ran outside, and found this poor birdie. She apparently hit the window and was knocked out cold on the ground.

Rob picked her up, and dribbled a few drops of water on her head. She eventually came to and gave us a quizzical look. I suppose flying high one moment and then waking up cupped in someone’s hand would be alarming. She remained there for ten minutes before gaining the strength to fly away.

These moments fill me with such joy. I’ve had some great memories in Costa Rica, but watching Rob nurse an injured bird makes me fall in love with him, and this country all over again.

(Sorry if I’ve not been posting as often. I’ve been writing the how-to book on Costa Rica, The Escape Manual. It’s going to be informative, and funny. My husband just gives me way too much material!)

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IT’S BETTER THAN CHILI’S

Costa Rica Cost Of Living Update: Bacon cheeseburger, french fries, ocean view, with a side dip in an infinity pool—$8

Last night our internet was down.  Rob and I got restless so it was the perfect time to grab our camera and check out a new restaurant that recently opened nearby. I like supporting new businesses because I know firsthand just how difficult running one can be. I remember when my book went on sale and I wondered if anyone would ever purchase it. I’m so grateful readers found me that I want to spread acts of kindness and help someone else out as often as I can.

The Club at Mar Vista is perched high on a hill with panoramic views of the ocean. Rob was anxious to catch the sunset so he raced up the hill so fast I’m pretty sure something important fell off our car. Lately, a lot of things are falling off our car. One day I’m going to fall off this car.

To our surprise, the owner of the restaurant turned out to be our friend, Bryan Campbell. He also happens to be the owner of the popular Café Mocha. I go there often, not just because of the coffee but because he makes the best brownies in Costa Rica. I knew he was starting another business, but he wanted to keep it under wraps until he was ready to open.  I can see why. This is not your ordinary place. This restaurant has an infinity pool that spans the entire establishment with an underwater lighting system that makes it irresistible to jump right in. Continue reading “IT’S BETTER THAN CHILI’S” »

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I’M FEELING THE LOVE

Costa Rica Cost Of Living Update: 5.3 ounce bag of Raisins—$1.60 (with the weirdest Chinese writing stamped all of over it)

I recently had the pleasure of hosting a book signing at Marie’s Restaurant in Flamingo, Costa Rica. It warmed my heart to see so many people come out to show their support.

When I left my hectic life in the United States, I was optimistic about finding a happier one. It wasn’t always easy, but I never gave up and kept working toward my dream. Like those Blow Pop lollipops I enjoyed as a kid, I knew if I could get past that hard candy coating, a bubble gum surprise would be waiting for me in the center.

The other night was something I could never have predicted. If someone would have told me at the airport five years ago—when my cat peed on my husband while walking through the metal detector—that I’d be signing books under palm trees, I would have thought you hit the airport bar a little too early. So I can’t thank all of you enough for following my story and making my book a success.

As I sit on my terrace this morning and watch the baby monkeys in the trees, I think back to all the crazy experiences my husband and I have had since moving to Costa Rica. Even with all of the challenges, I wouldn’t change a thing.

I think I finally cracked through that hard coating and found the bubble gum I was searching for. And what a wonderful surprise it is.

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A BOOM IN TOURISM

Costa Rica Cost Of Living Update: Neutering cat, antibiotics, parasitic medication, dewormer for two cats, protective collar– $48

It’s that time of year again. Tamarindo is bustling with tourists and the beaches are packed with eager participants learning to surf. I’m always amazed at how quickly the high season sneaks up on us, transforming this area into one of the top destinations in all of Central America.

This is a double edged sword for me. The grocery stores run out of the products I use and parking can be difficult. I have friends who want to visit and many of the condos are already rented out for the season. It appears that this year is already busier than the last.

But for all the small inconveniences that a resident deals with, I can’t help but get excited. Everywhere you look people are smiling and discussing the excursions they have booked. “Have you seen the monkeys?” I overhear one tourist say. “Did you book the estuary tour?” another says to his wife. It’s fun to see people visiting Costa Rica and doing more than just lying on the beach. They are thrilled by all the wonderful things this country has to offer. Hammocks and palm trees are great, but flying through the air on a zip-line or watching baby monkeys jump from branch to branch is exhilarating. Continue reading “A BOOM IN TOURISM” »

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MY HUSBAND IS AN IDIOT

Costa Rica Costa Of Living Update: Yearly Marchamo Renewal (registration and basic car insurance)— $213

Yesterday, my husband yelled for me to grab my camera and take a picture of an interesting spider he found on the bed. He was pretty cool with a long body and small stripes across his legs. I couldn’t pass it up.

“Make sure you get a picture of him running toward your face,” Rob said while picking him up with the tiny lid of an Edge Shaving Cream can. The spider’s legs were so long that they dangled over the rim. Once Rob dumped him back on our bed, I went all Anne Leibovitz and took about seventy-five shots of the arachnid. I’m surprised I didn’t stick him in a flower pot and put a daisy hat on his head. It wasn’t until he ran directly toward my mouth that I backed up and let him scurry away.

Later that day, I posted one of the pictures on Facebook where someone informed me that it’s a banana spider and he’s deadly. He can also jump up to four feet so it’s wise to stay a healthy distance away. If you want to see me spit a full mouth of coffee across my computer screen, this is about the best comment you can leave me. I wish there was a picture of the expression I gave my husband. Gentlemen, you know the face. The one your wife gives you at a dinner party when you say something dumb.

I immediately Google the spider and yes, he is deadly. But mine didn’t have the red fangs so if bitten, I wouldn’t die but would need to be rushed to the hospital due to “extensive pain.” This is nice because I could have shared a room with my husband, who would also be suffering from “extensive pain” after his eardrums exploded from me screaming at him.

If one of us was to get bit, I suppose it’s better being me. One of the symptoms in men is profoundly painful erections. If only that was the side effect of saying dumb things at dinner parties… Rob would never open his mouth again.

 

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